On Thursday 12th September, it was R U OK Day here in Australia.
Truth be told, the last 12 months have been.. a lot.
While I’ve nurtured our family through a bunch of health issues, it was a chain of business aspects that almost tipped me over the edge. While I had been very conscious of my energy reserves and taking good care of my mental space, something wasn’t ‘right’, I just couldn’t quite put my finger on it.
With the greatest of care, the words “burn out” were slipped back into my line of sight when talking with my specialist.
“Something needs to give, Amber.”
“You care too much..”
“You can’t continue like this, because….”
The one thing I knew that I hadn’t been taking care of, was my boundaries. #thatoldbombshell
So, I really leant into the [parenthood] reminder that “when all else fails – just add water”. The things like, having a shower and releasing all the frustration as the water washed it all away, checking in on how much I’ve had to drink, going outside barefoot and grounding with the cool, damp morning grass.
And sometimes, it just looked like a work from bed day, with eleventy million cups of tea.
One morning as I was doing some playing in ChatGPT, and I was in a moment of doubt about ev.ery.thing; so I asked it for advice.
(This is too good not to share in this week, because at some point, most of us will have this level of frustration, and want to do/ask/hear something similar.)
Hey chat. I’m getting to a point where I really hate being self employed, and it means that I am completely out of alignment with my values, purpose, and goals. Can you make some suggestions on how I can regain my mojo before I decide to close my doors?
In cometh my new therapist, Dr Chatty.
“It sounds like you’re in a tough spot right now, but I can imagine how hard it feels when your business no longer aligns with your values or purpose. Before you make any big decisions about closing your doors, let’s explore a few things that might help you reconnect with your “why” and regain some balance.
Here are a few ideas to regain your mojo:
1. Reconnect with Your Original Purpose
- Go back to why you started your business in the first place. What lit you up in the beginning? Were you driven by the flexibility, the impact on others, or the creativity?
- Reflect on the clients and projects that make you feel most fulfilled and energized. How can you focus on doing more of that kind of work?
2. Audit Your Current Business Model
- Are there tasks or services that drain your energy and feel out of alignment with your goals? Consider outsourcing those or dropping them altogether.
- Review how you’re spending your time. Does it reflect the boundaries you want to set? Are there ways you could streamline things to create more space for rest and self-care?
3. Shift Focus Toward Connection
- Since you love community and collaboration, maybe it’s time to lean more into those areas. Could you create or join a community where you exchange ideas with like-minded business owners? Sometimes, stepping away from the grind and connecting with others can spark fresh energy.
- Hosting a few more collaborative projects might help reignite your passion for what you do, and also reduce the feeling of carrying the burden alone.
4. Pause and Prioritize Self-Care
- Take a break. If that means a week or even just a few days, giving yourself permission to step back without guilt might give you the space to gain perspective.
- Re-establish daily or weekly rituals that ground you, whether that’s a morning walk, journaling, or a specific time of day for self-reflection and rest.
5. Revisit the Gentle Business Approach
- It sounds like “gentle business” is a core part of what you value, so check whether your current client base or offerings are supporting that. Are you working with the right kind of clients or creating offers that allow you to stay aligned with that gentler approach?
- If clients are pushing boundaries, consider being firmer with them or transitioning away from those that don’t align with the type of business you want to run.
6. Set New Boundaries
- Re-establish clear boundaries. Often, burnout comes from overextending yourself. If you’re working outside your business hours or dealing with pushy clients, setting clear and non-negotiable boundaries can create more breathing room and protect your energy.
7. Small Wins and Celebrations
- Start focusing on small, manageable goals instead of big, overarching objectives. Achieving small wins can boost your mood and give you momentum.
- Celebrate your past successes. Sometimes, when we’re caught up in the daily grind, we forget how far we’ve come. Reflect on what you’ve built and the impact you’ve had on your clients’ lives.
8. Consider a Pivot or Rebrand
- If certain aspects of your business are no longer working, you might not need to shut everything down—but perhaps shift your offerings or even rebrand to reflect the parts of business you truly love.
- Could there be another service or product that excites you more? Pivoting can be a great way to reinvigorate your passion without starting over entirely.
9. Consult a Mentor or Accountability Partner
- Sometimes an outside perspective can help you see things clearly. Since you’re interested in creating accountability partnerships, it could be time to engage one yourself. Talking through your challenges with someone who understands your business could offer fresh insights and help you realign.
10. Redefine Success
- Ask yourself what success looks like now. It may have shifted from what it was when you first started. Give yourself permission to redefine what success means for you, even if it looks different from the traditional business model.
If you feel like exploring these ideas and reflecting on what’s not working, it could be the thing that gets you back into alignment with what you love. Also, I’m here to help if you want to dive deeper into any specific areas.”
There’s been a really abrupt shift in how I think about the ‘what’ now.
My boundaries had been copping a beating business wise, and it was affecting the personal side.
Business is business, and sometimes that is the hardest part of owning one.
We apply the emotion to our business, and all the decisions needed within, not the other way round. And some decisions simply have to be made from that view point.
With my new ‘friend’ in tow, I’ve pulled my tail out from between my legs, and have created a realistic plan to get out of the rut I’m feeling caught in – starting with allowing space, reconnecting with my purpose, and allowing joy to lead me again.
Thank you Chat, for my pep talk.
“It’s not forever, it’s just for now.”